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Sunday, June 15, 2008

Atrocious Advertising: A Rant

When I watch television (which is not very often), there is a commercial that never fails to raise my blood pressure - a commercial that would be spot on and extremely effective, if only it was advertising the right product. What commercial do I speak of? I speak of the commercial for Monistat (I think) - you know - the commercial where some sorry fool stands there looking in the mirror at a storm-cloud floating over her nether region, then takes this medication and prepares a cup of joe while the sun shines over her ovaries and birds chirp out her ass. If you don't know what commercial I'm talking about, I apologise... I can't find a clip online.

Now, the clouds and chirping birds are not what I find irritating about this commercial. No, what I find irritating about this commercial is the fact that it is advertising a product for yeast infections, when really, it would be a perfect commercial for pre-menstrual syndrome (PMS). At least, that's the thought that occurred to me while I was doubled over in pain, envisioning dark gray funnel clouds wreaking havoc in my uterus and little lightning bolts blasting my ovaries to tiny bits (not to mention, thunder booming through my bowels, as I'm sure most women will agree).

I mean, I've (thankfully) never had a yeast infection, but isn't that more of a itchy, sticky, stinky sort of thing? As an advertisement for Monistat, I think the commercial would be much more accurate if the woman was shown standing in the middle of a room, with everyone around her standing back a safe distance. Or, maybe the woman could be shown fidgeting in her office chair, trying not to draw attention to the serious clam-digging taking place.

In fact, this commercial could even end with the woman praising Monistat, giving thanks she no longer has to deal with messy, time-consuming 'alternatives'.

In fact, this post could even end right now.

25 comments:

Nanny Goats In Panties said...

Yes! In fact, I could see a commercial for a yeast infection being more along the lines of a women in a business suit walking down a city street and periodically darting to a parking meter or a telephone pole, bending over in front of it and scratching herself with it like a bear does with a tree.

An innocuous grey cloud, indeed.

Da Old Man said...

LMAO @ "clam-digging"

You are officially the winner of the "Wordsmith of the Day Award.'

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